Scared Of Santa

Author: Denise Joyce
Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks
ISBN: 9780062204585
Size: 65.67 MB
Format: PDF
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He's huge and hairy and hulking. He dresses in strange furry clothing. He sneaks into people's homes at night. Who wouldn't be afraid of . . . Santa Claus ?!? Nothing says Christmas quite like innocent children shrieking with terror as a stranger dressed in red drags them kicking and screaming onto his lap. Now this time-honored rite of passage is celebrated with a hilarious collection of more than two hundred and fifty priceless photos of kids' traumatic trips to Santa's workshop. Scared of Santa offers a cornucopia of photographic funnies—from sixty-year-old family heirlooms to last year's howlers—along with delightful commentary on those unforgettable childhood visits to scary ol' Saint Nick.

Tracy Tam Santa Command

Author: Krystalyn Drown
Publisher: Month9Books, LLC
ISBN: 193976596X
Size: 64.12 MB
Format: PDF
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Tracy Tam doesn't really believe in Santa Claus, at least not like the rest of us do. She also doesn't believe that Santa can possibly deliver all of those presents in one night, to children around the world, without a little help from science. A flying sleigh can only be powered by jet engines, after all, and Santa's magical abilities can only be the result of altered DNA. How else could he know what every little girl and boy wants for Christmas and who has been naughty or nice? In order to test her theories, Tracy sneaks onto Santa's sleigh then ends up at Santa Command, where a team of (gasp!) humans monitor Santa's big night. When Tracy attempts to hack into their computers, she accidentally introduces a virus into the system. As a result, three states get knocked out of sync with the rest of the world (oops!). Santa won't be able to deliver all the presents in time! Now, Tracy must fix time and help Santa, but she has no idea how. How can a girl who doesn't believe help Santa and save Christmas before it's too late? With a little Christmas magic, of course!

The Santa Fe Jail

Author: Lars Jakobsen
Publisher: Graphic Universe ™
ISBN: 1467750484
Size: 35.82 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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A genius scientist has been kidnapped, and Mortensen is given a special assignment: deliver the ransom to the Santa Fe Jail. But the kidnappers are time travelers, so nothing is as simple as it seems. Before Mortensen sets foot in Santa Fe, he is drugged by a mysterious woman. He awakens to find himself packed inside a cargo plane that is about to nose dive into the jungles of Tanzania. Can Mortensen survive long enough to track down a clue that will lead him to the missing scientist?

Bertie S Escapade

Author: Kenneth Grahame
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780416579505
Size: 71.95 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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Bertie, an enterprising black pig, stirs up two rabbits to go carol singing. Their adventurous evening ends with a very sumptuous supper.

When Elves Attack

Author: Tim Dorsey
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0062092855
Size: 36.48 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
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“The undisputed king of the comic crime novel.” —Providence Journal Nobody does Florida weirdness quite like Tim Dorsey! Case in point: When Elves Attack, the New York Times bestselling author’s twisted Christmas present to his legion of adoring fans who can’t get enough of thrill-killer and Sunshine State historian Serge A. Storms, the most endearing psychopath since Dexter. Dorsey offers the perfect antidote for all those sappy feel-good holiday stories with this zany blockbuster extravaganza in which his wonderfully deranged serial killer Floridaphile delivers his special brand of Christmas cheer. More outrageous than Santa Claus in a Speedo, When Elves Attack serves up a Yuletide feast of the “pure gonzo humor” the New York Times Book Review enthusiastically attributes to this fearlessly funny writer. Think Bad Santa and National Lampoon’s Family Vacation, blend in Dorsey’s trademark appetite for destruction, and you’ve got hilarious crime fiction black comedy that anyone would be thrilled to discover stuffed in their Christmas stocking.

Frost At Christmas

Author: R D Wingfield
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1407068121
Size: 40.75 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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Ten days to Christmas and Tracey Uphill, aged eight, hasn't come home from Sunday school. Her mother, a pretty young prostitute, is desperate. Enter Detective Inspector Jack Frost, sloppy, scruffy and insubordinate. To help him investigate the case of the missing child, Frost has been assigned a new sidekick, the Chief Constable's nephew. Fresh to provincial Denton in an oversmart suit, Detective Constable Clive Barnard is an easy target for Frost's withering satire. Assisted and annoyed by Barnard, Frost, complete with a store of tasteless anecdotes to fit every occasion, proceeds with the investigation in typically unorthodox style. After he's consulted a local witch, Dead Man's Hollow yields up a skeleton. Frost finds himself drawn into an unsolved crime from the past and risks not only his career, but also his life...

Cowabunga Christmas

Author: Anna Celeste Burke
Publisher: CreateSpace
ISBN: 9781517347789
Size: 78.24 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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It's a Cowabunga Christmas in Corsario Cove for newlyweds, Kim and Brien. Surf's up at the exclusive resort they've chosen as their honeymoon destination. The Sanctuary Resort and Spa at Corsario Cove has everything: a spectacular location with scenic views of the Pacific Ocean, luxurious accommodations, 5-star cuisine, spa services, and a staff that aims to anticipate and meet your every need. A romantic midnight swim in the Club Level terrace pool changes everything when an unexpected guest drops in wearing a Santa Suit with a couple bullet holes in it! Who killed Santa? Kim and Brien are soon swept up in murder and mayhem trying to unravel the mystery.

Santa Calls

Author: William Joyce
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1481489607
Size: 10.57 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
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Three kids venture to the North Pole to help Santa defeat an army of evil elves in this holiday classic from the brilliant mind that brought you The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore. Art Atchinson Aimesworth—inventor, crime fighters, and all-around whiz kid—journeys north with his sister, Esther, and his pal Spaulding, by special invitation from Santa himself. Why did Santa call them to the North Pole? Art wants to know. But when Esther is taken by the Queen of the Dark Elves, Art must put his questions aside and save his sister. This reissue of William Joyce’s epic Christmas adventure now comes complete with lift-the-flap letters from Santa himself!

Ring In The Holidays

Author: Katie Lane
Publisher: Forever
ISBN: 9781455551859
Size: 59.96 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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THE BEST NEW YEAR'S EVE . . . EVER Psychologist Ellie Simpson is about to get a healthy dose of sex therapy. Leaving her cheating boyfriend behind, she has everything she needs for a quick rebound: Vegas, plenty of champagne, and a proposition from the sexiest man she's ever seen. As her handsome stranger helps her ring in the New Year-over and over again-Ellie finds herself blissfully losing all of her inhibitions. Attorney Matthew McPherson is good at making women lose things, like their minds and underwear. With his athletic build and soulful eyes, he doesn't need to use his powers of persuasion or famous last name to get a woman into bed. But when morning comes, Matthew finds Ellie is the only woman he can't bear to leave-ever. It's enough to make him wonder if what happens in Vegas really has to stay there.